Top Ten Tuesday

I know! I know! I'm a day late (last time I said that, I was pregnant)

Top Ten Things a Husband Should Never Say to his WIFE!

1) You smell like my grandma.

2) Sure...I'll do the dishes (then eight hours later...)

3) You sound just like your mom.

4) (at 3:00 a.m.) Are you awake?

5) That shirt makes you look pregnant.

6) Hey, dinner actually tasted good tonight!

7) Packin' on the pounds--eh?

8) Can you get me her number? (referring to the chesty blond who just jogged by)

9) My sister is a better cook.

10) I want to build an ethanol still in our back yard.

Hands off ladies...he's mine.

Into the woods...

Trying not to consider the cooler temperatures that facilitate the transformation of green to jewel tones...we marched into the woods Sunday afternoon and learned a few things:

1) There are no bathrooms in nature
2) You can read a book and hike without tripping
3) The wilderness may be a grasshopper's haven, but best beware the seven-year-old assassin!
4) Dogs and chocolate chip cookies don't mix well

Top Ten Tuesday

Sorry, folks…it’s been one of those weeks. But here it goes anyway...

Top Ten things I would spend money on if gas wasn’t so blinkin' high

1) Food
2) A facial
3) Highlights…or lowlights—some kind of “lights” so I wouldn’t look so mousy
4) New Shoes!
5) A renewable prescription for valium
6) A better attitude
7) Babysitters, babysitters, babysitters
8) Lunch with my sisters-in-law
9) A weekly massage
10) That straight jacket I’ve been so admiring…

One thing more and then I’ll shut up...

I really can’t recommend the Masterpiece Theater production of Jane Eyre enough. It overshadows past efforts where the acting was wooden and the portrayals of Rochester and Jane, cold and severe.

Ruth Wilson is an enigmatic Jane, brilliantly showing Jane’s progression from plain and obscure girl to a passionate, feeling woman. Toby Stephens is marvelous as Rochester. He’s handsome but not pretty. He’s moody and brooding but sensitive.

If you are looking for an interpretation that brings the passion of Jane Eyre to the screen…this is the one.

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/masterpiece/janeeyre/index.html

The link to the PBS website which gives some great information on the production of Jane Eyre, the locations (gorgeous!) and some history

Channeling Charlotte Bronte

I have had, for the past year now, a fear of books. I know, sounds ridiculous doesn’t it? But I’m not one of those readers who can nibble on books--the type of person who can pick up a book and put it down again, change a diaper, fix a meal and then pick it back up again…not without major anxiety that is. No. I am a passionate reader. I devour books (unless the writing is awful…I can chuck one of those books at anytime). Last October a friend pushed the book Twilight into my hands and made me promise to read it on our road trip to California. I just couldn't do it. It gathered dust on the piano at home while we were on the Nemo Submarine ride at Disneyland.

So it was with more than a little anxiety that I picked up this months book club read, Jane Eyre. It's one of my favorites. I almost lost my job over this book years ago when a coworker and I were reading it at the same time and sat with our heads together discussing Jane and Mr. Rochester rather than working.

Last week I was immersed in Jane Eyre. Not content to merely read the novel, I watched as many dramatic interpretations as possible, the absolute best being the Masterpiece Theater production...sucked me in and still hasn't let me go. I think I managed pretty well, however. My son ran out of socks and my husband...underwear. We made do with grilled cheese for dinner a couple of nights but no one died.

Now...what shall I read next!?

Always happy to post a picture of a handsome man...the brooding and oh-so-sexy Mr. Rochester (a-la Toby Stephens)

Top Ten Tuesday...
Top Ten Inappropriate Songs for Weddings and Funerals

Wedding:

The Rolling Stones: (I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction
Eurythmics: Thorn in My Side
The Rolling Stones: You Can’t Always Get What You Want
Annie Lennox: Thin Line Between Love and Hate
Harry Connick, Jr.: Don’t Get Around Much Anymore

Funeral:

Simon and Garfunkel: Bye Bye Love
Judy Garland: Over the Rainbow
Charlie Daniels Band: The Devil Went Down to Georgia
The Temptations: I Can’t Get Next to You
Pet Shop Boys: What Have I Done to Deserve This?

Top Ten Tuesday…on Saturday

This week a friend posted a “Top Ten Tuesday” list of movie quotes. I don’t doubt my ability to come up with ten movie quotes. If you know me then you know that my cup of trivia runneth over. However, I decided to put a twist on the list and do…

Top Ten Quotes from Everybody Loves Raymond

1) Ray (who is Italian): “I’m not really interested in other cultures,” after learning his mother has paid for a trip to Italy for the whole family.

2) Ray to Debra: “Just so ya know, you could have had sex tonight! And it was gonna be good…all new stuff!”

3) Frank to Robert after he’s accidentally sprayed Marie’s face with paint: “That’s gonna need another coat.”

4) Ray to Ally after Marie backs her car into their living room: “Grandma and Grandpa stopped by.”

5) Ray to Robert: “So let me get this straight, you’ve broadened the definition of the term “boogie” to include staying home by yourself, eating wheat thins?”

6) Marie to Frank: “If anyone looked inside you, all they’d find is meat.”

7) Frank: “Now what the hell am I? Just a list of cable channels and a big stinkin’ pile of bacon waiting to die!”

8) Ray: “I am someone who did not read Tom Sawyer, and yet I did not turn out to be a hobo.”

9) Debra to Ray: “You know, in the past your…dumbness…has gotten in the way of just a few things I’ve wanted to do: the book club… theater…having conversations—I just want to say this one thing and then we won’t have to discuss it again—You’re not blowing this for me pal!”

10) Ray to his brother Robert: “C’mon, when a man gets into bed with you…you put some pants on!”

Sunday in the chapel with Josh…

10:55 Arrive in church, sit down

11:01 Not liking the boundaries of the pew, Josh starts to voice his discontent…foyer

11:15 Back in the chapel

11:16 Discover that big sister ate all his snacks so there is nothing to stuff in his mouth to stop the screeching…foyer

11:25 Under the delusion that he’ll be quiet, I take him to the back of the chapel where he squirms out of my arms and begins pounding on the metal chairs of the overflow. He accompanies the drumming with deafening squeals of delight (convincing everyone I did not give birth to a child, but a howler monkey). foyer

11:42 Back into the chapel where I give my husband the skunk eye and tell him it’s his turn. I position myself as far away from Josh as I can

11:50 Josh toddles over to me with a big toothy grin. Who can resist that? Sits on my lap for 2.5 seconds before bouncing up to check the action on the pew behind us. They have magnetix, we do not. More discontent. Foy-errrr

11:59 Chapel again. Forcefully hand Josh to his dad and sit down, pretending to be from another country and don’t speak English. Ruckus. Dadoo takes Josh to the foyer.

12:01 Five year old begins to have a melt down because I tell her she needs to sit up. Are you kidding me? FOYER

12:03 Hand off five year old to Dadoo and I take over with Josh who wants ME. I mentally wave a white flag and take him outside to walk around the church. He, naturally, wants to crawl in the parking lot. I pick him up and carry him around the church

12:20 Back in the church and sacrament meeting is over

WHY DO I BOTHER?!?!?